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Yes -- it really has only been nine weeks. It seems so much longer. And, for the contestants of the Big Brother household who have held much of the nation in thrall, it has, no doubt, felt like a minging lifetime!
There are, of course, a handful of people who haven't had the slightest interest in watching a load of 20- to 30-somethings compete to win the grand prize of £70,000 simply by living with each other 24/7 in a purpose-built house in London. These people have never heard of Caggy, Nasty Nick or Juanita. Nor do they realise that phrases such as "Howwww funny!" and "You live by the sword, you die by the sword" have entered the nation's consciousness in a most peculiar way.
But, for us, and the housemates, the magic moment of 8.30pm, Friday, 15th September has been drawing ever closer. This is the moment we addicts have all been watching, working and waiting for. And, erm, voting for. The moment when the Lovely Davina will open her mouth to announce: "And the winner of Big Brother is...."
At which point, an anticipated 10 million viewers will stop breathing for a few seconds, lean forward in their armchairs and wait for the Name to burst from the television speakers.
Will it be Anna, Craig or Darren?
No doubt by Monday, it'll no longer be a case of "Whooo guurrs?" but "Who cares?" It's only a game show, after all.
But, in the meantime, perhaps we at The Motley Fool should stifle our own anticipation and don our jester caps for a second to see if we can proffer a little advice for the winner. After all, he or she will have £70,000 to spend. What on earth should they do with it?
So -- let's go into the Diary Room for a moment and look at the nominations:
Anna: 29-year-old lesbian former nun from Dublin -- currently an office manager who lives in London -- not known if she rents or has bought a home (most likely renting with her girlfriend).
Craig: 28-year-old builder whose business is, apparently, about £20,000 in debt, mainly because he has been building a house without, it appears, proper planning permission so it's at risk of being pulled down by the council (Oh dear).
Darren: 23-year-old father of three who still lives with his kids and ex-partner (the mother of his children) and works as a "Meeter and Greeter" at the Dome (Ooops!).
What do we at The Motley Fool think they could do with the dosh if they win?
James Carlisle (TMFJimmyC)
I think the winner should stick it in an index tracker. Personally, I'd invest it in shares, using my annual Capital Gains Tax exemption each year and adding to my ISA. But I doubt that Craig, Anna and Darren are up to single share investing at the moment. If they came to the Motley Fool, learned a bit and then invested in what they knew, they might be able to do more than just a tracker. Trouble is that, for Craig, "Investing In What He Knows" is going to have him chucking money at loads of building companies and that might not be the right route at the moment. Heaven knows what it would mean for Anna and Darren!
Christopher Spink (TMFEagle)
I think this is a great test, as £70,000 is a realistic inheritance nowadays, now that many more parents own their own property than was the case even 20 years ago. Also, more importantly, all these things depend on the individual's own situation which have been outlined here. Without further ado, and completely off the top of my head, I think:
Anna seems to like the urban London lifestyle and doesn't have children. Her day-to-day costs won't, therefore, be as large, so she could afford to be a little risky if she isn't worried about leaving someone a big pile of bricks when she dies. Therefore I think she should place half the pile in an index tracker, dripped in over a year. Use the rest to learn about shares and invest directly over a period of time. She sounds quite savvy and, if she wins, she might be interested in doing this.
Craig should find out how much he is being charged in interest on his debts. If it's substantially (50%) above base rate (6%) then he should pay it off in its entirety without hesitation. He might be best advised to plough two-thirds of the remainder into an index tracker over the next year. The remaining amount he might like to use to put his business on a sound footing, and to sort out the legal issues surrounding the planning permission relating to his home.
Darren's predicament is trickier. He really needs to ask himself two questions: whether he wants to stay in his ex-partner's place forever or set up on his own; and what job he plans on doing when the Dome shuts in three months' time. For these reasons, and because he has children to provide for, I think he needs access to cash more than the others do. Perhaps he should buy a house independently -- if he's only living with his ex-partner because he hasn't found anywhere else to go to yet. To support his children he'll probably have to keep working and, if he has his housing sorted out, then that would be a relief and something off his mind.
Rob Davies (TMFEssex)
Simple. Whoever wins should pay off all debts and use the remainder to put towards a house. As Anna and Darren both live in London, the £70,000 won't go as far as it will for Craig who lives in Shropshire.
Ultimately, all of them will need somewhere to live and housing has historically been a good investment. Moreover for this trio, who are probably financially innocent, a house or a flat is something they can comprehend and it has no capital gains tax complications. And if they don't want to live in it they can always rent it out and get an income.
Bruce Jackson (TMFGoogly)
Go down the local pub. Shout the whole bar. That should get rid of some of the cash. Enjoy being free again. Life is for living. DON'T buy a new car.
Pay off all non-mortgage debts. Stick the remaining money (less party expenses) into a high interest bank account. Then do nothing. DON'T visit a commission-based Independent Financial Advisor.
DO visit the Motley Fool site. Read the Ten Steps to Investing Foolishly. Read the discussion boards -- especially see what they were saying about you whilst you were locked away on Big Brother Island. Get educated, amused and enriched.
In a few short months, you will have the knowledge and confidence to take control of your own financial destiny. DO IT YOURSELF, Fool.
Disclaimer: I only watched 3 episodes of BB, and they were by accident.
Nick Jenkins (TMFJenko)
Darren should take three blocks of £10K and drip-feed it into index trackers for each of his kids who are all under 5 years old. It would give them a head start in life when they reach 18 or 21. He should also put £20K into an index tracker of his own (drip-feeding via an ISA over three years), so he has a bit extra put by for when he retires. He could then use half of the remaining £20K to sort out some accommodation away from his ex. The rest he can blow on his favourite designer clothes and tuck a bit away as an emergency cash fund.
Anna appears to have less to worry about. She should salt a decent lump sum away (perhaps £50,000), in the ubiquitous tracker -- again, drip-feeding via an ISA over a period of years. Or perhaps she could try a user-friendly mechanical strategy. Either way, let it grow nicely for retirement. The rest should be blown on loose women, a new guitar and a visit to the dentist!
Craig should sort out his debts, decide if he wants to concentrate on his business and, if so, plough two-thirds of the money into it. With what is left he could probably finish building his house and grease some palms at the planning office. I heard rumours that he was going to give it all away to charity though so, if he does, he needs to maximise the tax advantages....
And Finally...
Jane Mack (TMFJane)
Frankly, I don't really mind who wins. Craig needs it for his business, and Darren for his kids. Goodness only knows what Anna wants to do with it, but she's the one who's made me laugh most of all!
Whoever wins should put 90% of the prize money to one side in a high-interest savings account until they know what's going to happen as a result of the programme. After all, they might just be nine-day-wonders but, in six months' time, they'll definitely know if they've got Prospects!
In the meantime, spend the rest! Have some fun! Enjoy the freedom of having some money for a while, and, only then, think about what to do with the bulk of the winnings.
Whatever the winner decides to do, it is clear that Big Brother is now extremely close to his sell-by date. And, although he was damn good while he lasted, it's time for the rest of us to wipe the tears from our eyes, move on (e.g. get back to work!) and forget him.
But thanks for the memories. It was fun.
To quote Anna: "I'll miss you all... like a hole in the head"
Where Next?
We've got our own poll (which doesn't cost a squillion pounds a second), here. You'll have to register to vote in our poll, but don't worry -- that's free too, and you'll get access to all the Fool's advanced features, including our new and improved portfolio tracking system.
The Fool's Big Brother discussion board
To vote for Anna to win -- ring 090 11 980 101
To vote for Craig to win -- ring 090 11 980 102
To vote for Darren to win -- ring 090 11 980 103