Could sterling be set for a comeback?
I know this is an unfashionable view, but sterling isn't going to remain a burned-out basket case forever.
True, the pound in your pocket is pants right now. It is a sad and sorry excuse of a currency, the subject of mirth and derision around the world, and deservedly so. But these are volatile times, and a good old-fashioned contrarian might spot the opportunity for a return to favour at some point in the next six to 12 months.
Norsk Gods
I have to declare an interest here. For family reasons, I'm heavily exposed to the Norwegian krone, the Scandinavian David that is slaying global currency Goliaths, and it's a horrible experience.
In the last three years, I've watched the pound plunge 25% from 12 NOK to today's 9 NOK, with the prospect of worse to come.
I don't expect it to recover against the all-conquering krone, because Norway boasts plentiful gas, oil, an educated workforce, 1.7% unemployment, zero deficit and a fat oil fund that pays everybody's pensions. Its biggest economic worry is that a "krone bubble" will hit its export industries.
But Norway is a one-off. Major currencies such as the dollar, euro and Japanese yen aren't half as sturdy.
Of course it could get worse…
True, the pound has suffered a bigger fall than in 1992 and could fall even further over the next few months.
The Government has been pumping out bonds in a bid to cover our spiralling deficit, but the main buyer has been the Bank of England, through quantitative easing. That £200 billion splurge probably ends in February, at which point we'll discover whether anybody else has an appetite for UK public debt.
US investment group Pimco recently announced that it would be a net seller of UK bonds this year, which is a bad sign.
Bond sales have also been sustained by new liquidity rules for banks, which has forced them to buy gilts to strengthen their balance sheets, but that process has almost run its course.
Where's the beef?
If things look bad for the pound, it is hard to be bullish about the dollar or euro either. The US faces pretty much the same problems as the UK, and for pretty similar reasons. The euro has been riding high but could soon suffer a major pratfall of its own.
The Greek and Spanish fiscal tragedies could prove cathartic for the hubristic euro, especially if the Germans refuse to help them out. Another concern is that eurozone banks have failed to 'fess up to all their toxic debts.
The pound may be a wet lettuce right now, but if the eurozone cracks, it may recapture some of its British beef.
It's not all bad news
Other events could work in the pound's favour. The UK may be the last major global economy to emerge from recession but if Q4 figures confirm a return to growth, that may lift the pound. As will the end of quantitative easing.
Inflation may return faster than many people expect, forcing up interest rates and possibly sustaining the pound. Henderson New Star has even predicted the first base rate rise as early as March.
The first bond sale of the year was nicely subscribed, which augurs well for future issues.
The outcome of the election will be key. If the Tories sweep Gordon Brown into the dustbin and impose a tough emergency budget to impress the markets, expect a post-election currency fling.
On the other hand...
That's the upside. The downside is deadly. If opinion polls point to a hung parliament or unlikely Brown bounce, the pound might panic.
If the new government's deficit remedy fails to impress, the ratings agencies will slap us with a swift credit downgrade, making our massive debts even more expensive to service, and sucking the country into a debt spiral. It doesn't bear thinking about.
So the pound is still very much on the edge, but that doesn't mean it has to tip over.
You think I'm wrong, don't you
The pound has been oversold, and in the right conditions it could rally against currencies such as the dollar, euro or Japanese yen (which looks horribly overvalued to me).
If you think the pound will rebound, now probably isn't the time to go shopping for shares or funds in the eurozone or Japan, because you will get more for your money later. It might even be time to repatriate your profits.
If you disagree with me, and most of you will, you might want to shop for overseas assets before the pound weakens further, or invest in companies paying dividends in foreign currencies such as the US dollar.
Dead currency bounce
These are volatile times. The pound inexplicably rallied twice in the last three years, if only for a week or two, and both times I took the opportunity to ship money over to Norway (although sadly not enough).
In both cases, it turned out to be a dead cat bounce. If we see another of those, you will have to be nimble to benefit.
Yes, the pound is pathetic. And yes, it won't recover its full strength for years. But these are volatile times, and events still could give it a surprise boost. Although I still don't rate its chances against the mighty krone.
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