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MONEY COMMENT
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Our relationships with our money can be downright weird. For example, some of us have developed financial phobia, while others find money totally boring or far too complex. Indeed, a few yearn to quit the rat race and lead a simpler life. But very few of us find financial topics humorous, so I hope these quotes make you grin, smile or chuckle. Children and money Last June, I was almost in tears during an episode of long-running BBC TV comedy Have I Got News for You. One guest, comedienne Rebecca Front, related the following conversation with her pre-school son from one bedtime: Son: "Mummy, are you a homeowner?" Ms Front: "Yes, I am, although I do have a mortgage." Son: "Do you need an unsecured personal loan of up to £15,000?" Hilarious - and it shows the sinister side of financial advertising on TV! Budgeting George Best: "They say I wasted my money. I say 90% went on women, fast cars and booze. It was the rest I wasted." ee cummings: "I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart." Debt Robert Frost: "A bank is a place where they lend you an umbrella in fair weather and ask for it back when it begins to rain." Ilie Nastase: "I haven't reported my missing credit card to the police, because whoever stole it is spending less than my wife." Peter Ustinov: "The only reason I made a commercial for American Express was to pay for my American Express bill." Henry Youngman: "I've got all the money I'll ever need - if I die by four o'clock this afternoon." JP Getty: "If you owe the bank $100, that's your problem. If you owe the bank $100 million, that's the bank's problem." Investing Mark Twain: "October is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. Other dangerous months are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February." Bob Dinda: "Select stocks the way porcupines make love - very carefully." Peter Lynch: "I like buying companies that can be run by monkeys - because one day they will be." Wealth Spike Milligan: "All I ask is the chance to prove that money can't make me happy." Gertrude Stein: "Whoever said money can't buy happiness didn't know where to shop." More: 500 of the Most Witty, Acerbic and Erudite Things Ever Said About Money.